I Watched You Go By; Jenalle Lyddon

I watched you go; you’re too far out of my reach now.
I was there when everything happened.
The bright lights, the screaming, everything.
We both wore our belts and tried to move out of the person's way.
The rest comes as a blur but all I can remember was calling your name, hoping you'd respond.
Flashing lights are now around me, helping me out, I don't know where you are and I franticly look about.
I then look at the car.
Tears flooded me face and I fell to the ground.
Hugging my knees while rocking back and forth, a man came up to me.
You left me that night, which seemed perfect at the time.
You were my friend, the one I looked up to.
You were the world to me.
You were my mom, my dad, my aunt, my uncle, my cousin, most of all, my sibling.
You gave me the inspiration and courage to face the world.
Now I stand at your grave, crying silent tears of that night we shared for the last time.
I wished it was me that was taken from the world instead of you.
I can’t look at anyone anymore with those happy eyes.
Everything left me on that night even though it took forever to get a smile to spread my face.
I’m now gripping your tombstone as if it were you, the way I used to.
I fear to get into any car again.
It’s been hard these years without you,
Out of our family and friends, you were the closest to me.
We kept your room the way it was before the accident.
I’m the one that goes in there all the time, wanting to see if I can feel your presents or hear your voice.
Sometimes I would sneak in your room at night just to think you would come in an hour later to kick me out.
As reality comes back to me so does a flood of fresh tears.
I cling to your pillow as I cry myself to sleep.
I watched you go and now you’re too far for me to reach.