Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Special Best Friend.

I remember the first time I heard about this girl. I had figured she was just like another I didn't really care for since they were friends and seemed as if they rather not talk to anybody else. They were Harry Potter library nerds who read at insane times for the size of the books they consumed. How they spent practically every waking hour discussing the latest book they read or some stupid little thing that was significant about their day as if it was the latest thing heard on the news.

      It wasn't until I was in grade 11 and her in grade 10 that we came face to face. As I recall that day, it was one of the many snow days we managed to get in one week during the winter season. A friend of mine, her and myself ended up talking about everything on the tips of our tongues. When I say everything, I mean EVERYTHING and anything we could think about. From her trip to Peru with her church to how the teachers became school kids at the thought of not having to teach.

      From that day onwards, we hung out and she became apart of the group. I had judged her before I knew her and yet I instantly liked who she was as a person. Her Faith was important and trying to be the better person was a self indulged goal. Most of the time I couldn't wait to see her when lunch hour came about. They became a constant need to have. Just seeing her smiling face in the mornings before class made everything so much better.

      It wasn't until the next year that our friendship grew stronger. How we ended up hanging out more and more outside of school. Where phone calls and MSN couldn't stop our days conversations. It was then that I told her about my past. How everything came into play, where it started from to where I had stood at that moment. She had cried with me and began to slowly allow me in.

      I remember the panic attacks, flashbacks and the tears. Her shaking from one who haunted her dreams, thoughts and made her a nervous wreck when they contacted her. Her scares she bore physically, emotionally and mentally were evident. She felt out of place in her own body and amongst friends and family. I had made it as a person who has gone through suicidal depression to help this starving soul get back on her feet the best I could and no I'm not conceeded. I know what it's like to want someone to just listen without judging.

      I've now realized that we have pulled each other up time and time again. From my addictions to her self-esteem, confidence and eating habits. Our Faith has grown to the point we have both gotten Baptised within the last 5 months. Recently we'd get together, have a blast and then have her parents walk into the room and have to take double takes for we ended up reading scripture and talking about what we had just read or are in need of understanding from both points of view.

We both have been clean for a long while now.

Our scares seen and unseen remind us that we CAN over come rough patches we are faced with.

Lately all I see her in are shorts and spaghetti straps not afraid anymore of what others say and don't say.

She is eating and keeping her shape in a healthier way.

A sister from another family whom I love and adore so much.
She is my encouragement and my special best friend.

     So, as you stay for another half a year to work to then go to school the next as I leave for 6 months to the States, just know that we are never too far apart. Sure the phone lines will ring, Face book, Skype and MSN will be of main usages but I have no doubt in my mind that our friendship will ever end.

True friends can be away from each other for a long time to come back and feel like there was never a distance.

You know who you are and I'm so glad to call you my special best friend, my sister.

Saturday, July 2, 2011

A song (a friend started, I added to)

 
This world is full so much pain and heartache,
you sit there and your heart keeps breaking and your not happy.
what can I do Lord, to see your face lighting up this with 
your glory your glorry Lord
 
(Friend wrote this verse, the rest below are mine)


Though I'm only mere Human, a pawn to do your bidding

How is it you sit there and watch it all unfold
You call to those important to you
yet allow others to fall
You have chosen Lord..
I promise not to fall

As the sun goes down for another day done

Little children read to and tucked in
You look upon your creation and know its not right
Yet you hold tight, you hold tight

Running up the street as the rain pours down

I wonder to myself, am I gunna drown?
Looking up to the sky, tears of joy trail down my face
I am here and want to do your bidding

Hold still my child for I am not done

Though this world is finished there are those who still cry out
Some wish to be saved while the rest cave
I'm grasping your hand, take mine into account

Trying to please Him, I can only do one thing

Fight for what I believe in and shun all other things
Live life to the fullest yet prepared when the time comes
My life is yours My Father, My God
Take me when you're Done